Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
