do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
We were destined to go to rehab together
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
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