Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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