I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
