I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
