You're so nebulous sometimes
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
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