So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Randomize
