the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
