Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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