Fine. I'll sleep in my office
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
