Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I just gargled with NyQuil
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
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