So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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