stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
where are you?
Hypothermia
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
