I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
