i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
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