Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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