Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
