You're completely useless in the revolution.
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
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