dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
