Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize