u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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