I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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