my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
