Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
