when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
