So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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