i don't like sucking hair
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize