Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
