drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
