lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
