We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
