ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
false alarm. still invincible.
operation harelip BJ is a go
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
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