Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
