He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
