do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
