I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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