do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Randomize
