No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
