Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
