when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
