the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Randomize
