Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Randomize
