and next time when you feel me up, do it right
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
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