I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
