I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
