My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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