drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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