no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I'm like, not good at living.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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