I like my sex mixed with concussions.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
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