Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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