garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
