who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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